Wednesday, September 20, 2006

The Contract (Part 3)

Krish sat in the lawyer’s office with a pounding headache, partly because of sleep deprivation and partly because his head was imploding with thoughts at a million ideas per second. He dug into the skin of his forehead to relieve the pain and closed his eyes to focus his thoughts on the contract renewal.

Lawyer: Here you are. Take your pick.

He had a red pill in one palm and a blue pill in another.
Krish’s eyes opened wide.

L: You take the red pill and the story ends. You forget about the contract, live your life for another year and get terminated. You wake in your bed and forget this ever happened. You take the blue pill and you stay here until we figure out a proposal for the contract. My advice is to go with the red pill.

K: Holy shit! The Matrix is real?

Lawyer bursts out in hysterical laughter.

K: What is so funny?
L: You are so gullible. This never gets old.
K: I am glad at least one of us is having fun.
L: When the Wachowski brothers were up for their contract renewal, they came up with the whole Matrix spiel as a bid to explain the universe. The committee thought that the brothers could make tremendous contribution to the field of literature. They were granted the scholarship of Most Promising Humorous Writers.
K: I knew you were kidding with those pills you know?
L: Sure. Here is the red one. It’s ibuprofen for you headache.
K: Thanks.

Krish gulps down the pill and waits patiently for the throbbing in his head to stop.

K: So does the committee favor string theory over the matrix?
L: All I know is that the physics books go straight to the Humor section and the religious philosophy goes under Fiction.
K: So we aren’t even close in unraveling the workings of the universe?
L: Humanity has a lot of growing up to do. We are still fighting religious wars.
K: Don’t be such a pessimist. I don’t know how long it would take us but I have no doubts that we will get there someday…unless we nuke each other out…and the roaches will inherit the earth. Goddamn roaches.
L: Earth calling Krish.
K: Or maybe our purpose on earth is to figure out our purpose. That’s it!
L: God dammit, did I give you the wrong pill?

Lawyer inspects the pills.

K: I am serious. Figuring out our purpose is the next step in our intellectual evolution.
L: Evolution sadly lacks direction. The fact that humans are on the top of the food chain should be proof enough that evolution has no direction and natural selection has failed miserably.
K: Aw come on, you don’t believe that our evolution is all merely a series of highly improbable coincidences?
L: You disagree?
K: All I am saying is that life couldn’t have come together beating all the odds. Do you know what the probability of that is?
L: You have started the line of questioning that intelligent design proponents pose. Without going into the science of it I would just say just because something is not highly probable does not mean it can’t happen. But assuming that we have evolved with a purpose, what do you speculate that is?
K: I find humans to have a blend of characteristics that enable us to outperform any other species on earth. There is the intellect, logic and rational thinking on one hand but we don’t function like robots. We have emotions which functions on an alternative plane to rationality and in my opinion is the essential ingredient that fuels our imagination.
L: Okay, first of all we are not exactly outperforming all the other species. The viruses and bacteria are giving us a run for the money wouldn’t you say? They have shared this planet with us for all our existence and they are doing just fine…nowhere near extinction. They do all this without any fancy nuclear missiles, just old fashioned toxins and shit. But that aside, are you convinced that an entity functioning solely on rationality will not be capable of understanding the meaning of life?
K: Yes. Just like a computer can’t appreciate the serenity of a sunset on the beach. The feeling is lost on it.
L: And it is important to appreciate the serenity of the sunset to understand the universe?
K: I’d like to believe that.

Lawyer smiles.

L: Sometimes it’s just too ambitious and maybe futile to ask these questions. What will the ant do if it finally figured out how our subway systems work?
K: It does not matter what the ant does. The nirvana is in the figuring out.
L: The journey is more important to you then?
K: Yes…and preferably a long journey might I add.

Both smile.

L: What if the ant does not have the capacity to understand the subway system? It’s like trying to store a GB of information in a 1KB memory stick.
K: The ants can always come together.
L: That’s the catch isn’t it?
K: Yeah, we have some centuries of bickering ahead of us. But you don’t seem to buy this?
L: A little cliché but I like to think that key to life is in its desire to perpetuate. It is one force that every individual has to fight really hard against if one ever decides to resist. It is wired in our system and therein lays the crux. But my small brain does not allow me to delve into this any further. Besides, I prefer the universe shrouded in mystery. Some things are better unknown.
K: You must be kidding me. How could you just sit there and let this incredible gift of intelligence just rot?
L: I prefer simplicity. Ignorance works for me.
K: That’s preposterous.
L: Oh look at the time. I need to attend to other matters now. I am sure you have places to be and things to do.
K: Alright. I guess I will see you tomorrow then?
L: Of course. Have a good day now.
K: Yes…you too.

Krish made his way through the eerily quiet office building to the vibrant streets of Manhattan. The distress of his impending demise had vanished completely. The usually annoying sounds of traffic resounded like a jazz symphony in his ears. He didn’t ever like jazz but today he enjoyed it immensely.

Then a whiff of aroma from a neighboring hot dog stall caught Krish’s fancy. His tummy growled sensing the feast. Krish was a very picky eater who would rather starve than eat anything he disliked. A delightful piece of mystery meat slapped carelessly with mustard seemed to be a fitting meal for no good reason. His spirits were lifted like a helium filled balloon and he walked the streets in hysterical stupor. Nothing at the moment seemed to follow reason in his mind. The realization of mortality had given him certain liberties that he would’ve never taken otherwise. There was so little to lose other than time.

(...to be continued)

9 comments:

Just Mohit said...

"physics books go straight to the Humor section and the religious philosophy goes under Fiction"

(nodding head sagely) uh-huh! you stole from my diary too?! ;-)

Cruel Intentions said...

Hey you know you can change the amount your blog is worth? Did you Manipulate it? ;-)

Nobody said...

Hey Cryz
I been reading your blogs since someone directed me to your Mahabharata series.
Even since I've been visiting your page every couple of days hoping u posted something more.
Its a really interesting way you write and think.

About Krish.. i'm eagerly waiting to see what happens to Krish. I know its not gonna be different than what I may think.
I'm gonna start my blog soon. I know it wont be anywhere near to the quality of your blog, but i'll just express my thoughts there.

Anyway, thanks for blogging and keep blogging.

Crystal blur said...

Mohit,
How could you put blemish on my wuriginal thinking.:p

Cruel,
Goddammit, now look what you have done. Here I was happily sitting on my modest and honest earnings of 32,000 odd dollars and then you put that comment. One minute later (can't believe it was that easy) my blog worth sky rocketed as you can see. High five!

nobody,
Thanks for the pat on the back buddy. Will see you around in the blogosphere soon. It's a lot of fun and I am sure you will have a great time.

Drunken Master said...

Is there a WOMBAT code thingy we could get our hands on to get the inside dish on Krish's fate?

Sairam said...

cryz ..

the profundity , i believe thats the right word, of this story is increasing post after post. ...
I presume tht introspection through krish seems to be driving you deeper and deeper into this idea [:)] ..

"K: Or maybe our purpose on earth is to figure out our purpose. That’s it!
L: God dammit, did I give you the wrong pill?"

was classical cryz .. u wanna say something serious ..but still garnish it with the humor ! (love tht style )

Crystal blur said...

drunken master,
Krish said, "journey is important, not the destination" :p

sairam,
i try not to take myself too seriously :)

cheti said...

Crys !! what can I say ! Amazing sense of humour and thought process !

Love every word of it !

Crystal blur said...

Thanks cheti :)